2020 is a big one for many. I have personally decided to turn a few things around for myself, to have the courage to express a higher truth in self expression, vulnerabilities, and passion. The process of exposing one’s self has it’s challenges, specifically fear of judgement from your community and society, especially if you have a conservative background. I was inspired by those in a similar situation with a different context and content. I was influenced by their courage to follow heart, true purpose and manifest inner, intelligent beliefs.
Some people are not meant to fit neatly into any social or professional category. They are meant to succeed unconventionally through innovative, progressive approaches. Last year, I came across a profile that offers us this very inspiration- to go beyond what society expects of you: beyond achievement, surpassing capabilities expected from home and community – and acing it. Ultimately, Daniel took a decision to take on a second life and pursue his true interest and purpose- to change the perception of sex, intimacy and it’s associations. This is not a rebellious streak- this is a vision to change culture. To explore and normalize carnal instinct that relates to physical and emotional appetite which, let’s face it, for years has been sectioned for taboo by society, belief systems and law.
Daniel Saynt is the Chief Conspirator of the movement brand New Society for Wellness aka NSFW, a members-only club and a creative agency for sexual wellness and cannabis brands. He’s an activist fighting against censorship, an evangelist for cultivating consent culture and a public speaker on all the things not safe for work.
Daniel got his start in the fashion industry, first as a blogger behind the industry skewering FashionIndie. He then became Chief Marketing Officer for a women’s lifestyle brand and launched an agency called Socialyte which represented social media influencers. He worked on campaigns for brands like Vogue and Burberry, but realized that he wanted to use his marketing skills on categories that bring people real happiness and fulfillment.
So, he stopped selling shoes and makeup and began selling sex and cannabis. Here’s our chat with Daniel on how he’s maintained skill and passion but changed category.
What is NSFW?
NSFW is the New Society for Wellness. We’re a community focused on spreading positive messages about sex and cannabis. We do this by hosting educational events that are safe and judgement free where people can meet, learn and connect. We partner with brands in the sexual wellness and cannabis health space to introduce them to our members and create opportunities to speak to millions through our influential supporters. It’s part social club, part creative agency, all for the purpose of destigmatizing two of God’s greatest gifts to us.
What inspired you to begin NSFW and was there even a market for it?
Sex and cannabis have always had a strong presence in my life. I grew up in a repressive, cult-like religion where we were taught that even thinking about sex was a crime against God. Knowing I was bisexual from an early age, I found it difficult to believe that God would want us to live repressively when he gave us so many ways to truly express ourselves. I decided to go on a bit of a journey through all the hidden aspects of sex. I went to hundreds of events and found that what so many of these spaces lacked was a sense of community. It was cold, uncommitted, and many times spaces were unsafe, where consent was often ignored. I felt there should be something different. Something that was designed around women first and created to embrace the full spectrum of LGBTQ+ identities. I wanted a space that focused on education first, allowing people to experience a more sexually open lifestyle at their own pace. I also wanted to make consent our focus, teaching our members about enthusiastic consent and the importance of talking competently about sexual desires. The result has been a community of over 2,000 members who attend our adventures regularly to better connect to others.
Even with the modern-day counter-culture movement normalization of “taboos” like cannabis use and sexuality, was it difficult to get NSFW up and running?
It was very difficult.
I started it while I was still running digital at NYLON and was CEO of the influencer agency I created, Socialyte. It really started off with a small group of friends and quickly grew gaining media attention. When I finally outed myself as Chief Conspirator, it was decided that I had to focus on NSFW.
Outside of that we’ve had numerous hurdles in developing the New Society. We’ve been shut down by Instagram, Facebook and have been refused advertising on Google. We’ve had our accounts terminated on Paypal and Stripe.
Daniel Saynt, NSFW
I’ve been verbally harassed by right-winged communities for being open about my lifestyle and encouraging others to open themselves up. There’s a real, unspoken fear amongst many communities that is related to female sexuality, etc. The fluidity of sexuality is also very concerning to some communities, so there’s a constant barrage of negativity that comes out of the inability to understand beyond personal or community beliefs. I feel that there are people out there from various communities that internalize negativity they carry for their own limited (sexual) experiences. That negativity is then pointed to anyone who’s sexually free.
Stigma has been difficult to deal with, but there’s also a lot of negativity that came from poly and play communities of New York early in our development. Some didn’t like our approach to sex positivity and felt we were trying to make their lifestyle commercial and mainstream. I never understood why they were against this. For me, this is more than just a company, it’s my lifestyle and way of life. Why wouldn’t someone want you to be proud about that?
Overall, NSFW has been one of the most challenging companies I’ve managed. Our first four years were tumultuous with many nights spent wondering if it was all worth it. I gave up so much to be able to live the way I choose and to give people a place to truly feel free. I’m fortunate we have the support of our community. Without them, we wouldn’t be where we are today.
How did you transition from your previous company into NSFW? Were you able to leverage your network and use it for your current business?
I think a lot of people in my past network of contacts are still in shock by my decision to leave fashion for sex. The industry is so fragile and filled with personalities that are constantly worried about public perception. The idea of a sex club is terrifying for these individuals. While some of my past contacts have become members and now, discretely, enjoy themselves at our adventures, for many I felt there was feeling that I committed career suicide.
I was a successful fashion CEO who was getting Bloomberg profiles and running a respected, multi-million media brand. I had risen from lowly fashion blogger begging for fashion week passes to what some would consider the top of the totem pole, running a magazine and working with brands like Burberry, Louis Vuitton and Vogue. It was just insanity that I would give that up to live unapologetically as a poly, bisexual man.
When I left, it was almost like that network was gone, but what I found was a much richer community of people that didn’t treat sex as something shameful. I found people with lives which wasn’t consumed by consumerism. My career aspirations were no longer tied to convincing people to buy things which didn’t actually make them happy. I was about to apply my skills to selling a product I truly believed in. I found peace.
I found people with lives which wasn’t consumed by consumerism. My career aspirations were no longer tied to convincing people to buy things which didn’t actually make them happy.
Daniel Saynt
My suggestion to anyone looking to make a controversial career shift is to make sure you have the support you need. Whether it’s your partner, your friends, your business partner, make sure there are others who believe in what you’re trying to do. That support will be necessary as you face challenges. Also, be in control of your narrative. Don’t let others tell you who you are and what you believe in.
My suggestion to anyone looking to make a controversial career shift is to make sure you have the support you need. Whether it’s your partner, your friends, your business partner, make sure there are others who believe in what you’re trying to do.
Daniel Saynt
If you’re thinking of leaving a comfy position for a new venture, make sure you communicate with your network. Make sure you let those who follow your life know, why you made the decision and include them in the story of what you’re creating. One of the things that make me unique as an entrepreneur is that I am constantly sharing my successes and failures with my followers/fans/friends. It’s a left over from my days as a fashion blogger. This provides me with support from my community and often great suggestions for dealing with the hurdles that arise.
How do you select your members? Do they apply to be a part of NSFW? Tell us about the process.
Members apply on NS-FW.com/join. They are asked to create a profile which includes questions like “What will you contribute to our community?”. There are dozens of options for how you identify and what you’re looking for. Potential members also provide their social profile. Our Membership Director reviews each profile and we look for various points of attraction which include physical attributes, career, age, travels, circle of friends and their relationship status. We review social to get an idea on their worldview. We believe that if you can’t have a conversation with someone, you probably shouldn’t share intimacy with them. We are looking for people with stories to tell. It’s really about finding those stories.
Why the inclusion of cannabis and what’s your brand of preference?
We see efforts today from pharmaceutical brands desperate to repress access to cannabis. These brands are aware of the miraculous power of cannabis- not only in combating depression, PTSD, stress, epilepsy, decreased libido and cancer, but also in making many of their billion dollar drugs pointless.
Also, I love smoking weed. So I guess that’s a reason too.
In terms of vendor, we’re currently creating a custom strain of weed, appropriately called NSFW with Cherry Kola Farms. The new Hybrid is the first that’s been specifically designed to increase libido. We are expecting the first batch to be ready this January. We eventually plan to create our own “Anointing Oil” from the batch mixing natural herbs like damiana to enhance the sexual experience.
What sets NSFW apart from other NYC sex clubs/parties?
There are sex clubs and sex parties. NSFW is a Love Club. We are focused on elements which help connect people, bringing our community together. This is about building relationships. We are focused on activism and the importance of being loud and proud about being open, poly, kinky, or sexually free. We’ve recently launched the PRo SEX Initiative, which is our activism arm aimed at empowering grassroots efforts to end slut shaming and pass legislation which will protect the rights of the sexually explorative.
Other places offer sex. We offer a community and a shared mission to change how others view sex.
Other than a careful screening process for members, how does NSFW ensure a safe environment?
Our aim to to create safe, judgement-free spaces for exploration. In order to do this, we cultivate consent culture.
We do this by having a shared Code of Conduct, which guides how members should behave. We also reiterate rules about consent entry at our events by a recital of our House Rules: Respect, Hydrate, and Don’t Be a Creeper. At events, we usually have 2-3 existing members who act as our Nymphs. Nymphs wear white (dress code is black) and are on hand if anyone has an issue or feels someone is displaying inappropriate behavior. After the event, the membership is encouraged to self police and a Creeper Report is sent out. They can report anyone at this time and we work with the member to decide on the best course of action. This can include required attendance to our Send Noobs event (hosted monthly). At this adventure, we present our workshop “How to Ask for Sex” which is focused on encouraging enthusiastic consent which is asking for verbal confirmation before touching someone or progressing sexually. Overall, we’re at a point where the membership polices itself. Once people discover NSFW, they tend to not want to leave, which makes them more motivated to report when someone’s not upholding our Code.
How do you conceptualize/prepare for each event you host? What was the last one and your favorite?
We have a number of courses we’ve developed overtime including, The Cunning Linguist (oral, vaginal class), Learn the Ropes (Shibari workshop) and Pegged (male prostate stimulation class). Many events are inspired by member requests. We work with a talented group of professional dommes and sex educators to curate programming for the club. We mix in a lot of demonstrations to our larger events like PlayDate and KinkLab, which makes those events feel more party like, less workshoppy.
Our most recent event was Prom Night, a costumed party which included a lot of hot for teacher play and opportunities for high school inspired debauchery. We host larger costumed events throughout the year including Bacchus (our Roman inspired celebration of sex and libations), All Saynts Day (my birthday and a sacrilegious celebration where everyone is encouraged to dress religiously), and 1920 (a speakeasy inspired event inspired by the prohibition era).
My favorite is All Saynts Day.
It’s the only place on earth where you can see all the religions come together.
If you could sum up NSFW in a quote, what would it be?
A safe, judgement-free space to explore and make friends.
This interview has been co-authored and produced.
Questions by Roba Amr Awad & Intro/ Edits by Nancy Rahman.
Photography by Jordan Frey from Hey Renne.
Stylist: Feature’s own.
